


Gone and Back Again

by ihaveacleverfandomurl



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Alternate Universe - After College/University, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Andrew Minyard Has Feelings, Angst, Happy Ending, M/M, Nicky/Erik get married, and andrew pushes everyone away after neil disappears, neil escapes after his father kidnaps him and doesn't go back to the foxes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-08-05
Packaged: 2019-12-07 09:26:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18233012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ihaveacleverfandomurl/pseuds/ihaveacleverfandomurl
Summary: Neil Josten kissed Andrew Minyard, told him his life story, that he could stand on his own, and that Andrew didn’t need to protect him anymore.Then Neil Josten vanished.Except now, years later, he’s showed up again – shot and bleeding out.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i’m also back again, using a bit of a language i am not familiar with, but this time, with no friend who speaks it – just a little background in dutch and prayers that i make sense ;)))  
> cATCH ME BACK IN AFTG TERRITORY AFTER READING A BUNCH OF FICS WOW HAVE THIS SHITTY CANON DIVERGENCE PIECE I CAME UP WITH AND WROTE IN ONE NIGHT LOVE Y’ALL BYE  
> psst: [check out my new purely AFTG tumblr here if you'd like i'd really appreciate it!!](https://foxy-exy.tumblr.com/)

Andrew Minyard stubbed his cigarette filter out on the café table and spared only a brief glance at his phone lying next to his pastry – lit up and buzzing with _Nicky, your hottest cousin_ and five too many emojis.

He wasn’t in the mood for Nicky’s bullshit today. He was probably calling to remind Andrew about his upcoming wedding, yet again, which would inevitably devolve into half-panicked crying about all the details he and Erik hadn’t figured out yet. Andrew would try to hang up, and Nicky would quickly switch to lighter small talk, except that “lighter small talk” would probably be Nicky’s attempt at subtle nudges about whether he had been in contact with a single Fox.

Andrew hadn’t. Of course he hadn’t. Aaron fucked off to someplace with his cheerleader, married her, and went to med school, Renee tried to call but all too often found herself busy with volunteer work and they couldn’t find much to talk about over the phone these days anyway, and Nicky knew how much Andrew avoided his calls. Kevin…well, he’d made his own shaky way off to play his damn dream game, away from his shadow of a “brother.” He didn’t need Andrew anymore.

Matt and Dan and Allison could do whatever the hell they wanted, they didn’t speak, and Andrew _definitely_ didn’t speak to any of those damn underclassmen he’d left on that court without a qualm. They hadn’t known, when they’d shown up, just what the Foxes had lost the season before.

More than just their shot at the championships. Much more.

A text.

_Nicky, your hottest cousin: talk to meeeee andrew_

_Nicky, your hottest cousin: if you don’t talk to me i’ll tell renee_

_Nicky, your hottest cousin: I’LL DIG UP BEE’S NUMBER_

Andrew glared at the text and finally opened it.

_Andrew: You don’t have anything new to say. Call me when it won’t be the exact same exchange._

_Nicky, your hottest cousin: promise me you’ll show up???_

_Andrew: I said I would be there. And don’t threaten me with Bee again._

The thought of his old therapist just brought up images of her slumped shoulders and sad eyes, in those last years of college. _“We’ve come so far, Andrew. I would love it if you would talk to me again. I know losing Neil still feels fresh, but can you tell me anything about how you’re feeling?”_

“Still feels fresh” – it had been a year. A year of almost wishing he was back on the drugs, it had been so painfully numb.

_“Thank you. You were amazing.”_

Andrew slammed the phone cradled between his hands back onto the table and white knuckled his lighter to the tip of another cigarette.

“Fuck off,” he muttered to a phantom boy sitting across the table from him, something sad and sorry and blank in his eyes. And something scared and determined, too.

Kevin had told them, after. About all the truths hidden between the lies. The FBI told them later − Nathaniel Wesninski had escaped his father, badly injured, had slipped their custody, and was most likely deceased.

He’d known where he was going. He’d known that fight would break out, and he’d known he would be taken. And he’d left Andrew with those damn last words.

Andrew pulled the cigarette from his mouth and watched the smoke wind a thin tendril upward. Hated that holding it made him think of _him_ , and hating even more that he’d taken to simply sticking a lit cigarette between two fingers to watch it burn down rather than smoke it because he wanted to be reminded.

***

Germany could be deemed nice, if Andrew was the type for travel. (He wasn’t.)

His old teammates might be considered thoughtful, with how much they’d been trying over the past week to meet up with him, if they were acting outside of thoughts of meddling. (They weren’t.)

And his suit for this damn wedding where he would be forced to see each and every ghost he’d carefully detached himself from over the past few years was perhaps too tight, except – oh no, it was.

Why had he decided half an hour’s walk was “within walking distance” from this venue? He adjusted his collar for the fifth time and tried to ignore the bead of sweat making its slow trek down the center of his back.

The gunshot was distant, when he first heard it, quiet enough and masked by city noise that at first he didn’t think it was anything. The second shot, he stiffened and stopped, swinging around, a hand sliding up his sleeve for a knife, and listened to the third and fourth with his nerves jangling.

The streets were relatively empty, mostly just cars passing him by. Several other pedestrians looked around at the noise, eyed each other nervously, and continued, all suddenly hurrying in the opposite direction.

Andrew eyed his watch – Nicky would try to eviscerate him if he was late, but he could fucking deal − the retreating backs of everyone else on the street, and set off towards the noise.

It had stopped, still far away, and it seemed just about all other passersby had cleared out. Andrew peered down an intersecting, dark alley and almost knifed the body that came barreling out at him.

The man ran headlong into him and fell, heavy breaths stuttering harsher as he hiccupped a particularly painful pant, arms wrapped around his middle, head curled inward. His legs windmilled as he tried to shove himself onward, back to his feet, but he was shaking too hard to find purchase.

Andrew eyed the blood that was pooling beneath him – gunshot wound, red soaking through the stomach of his shirt – and squatted next to him, shoving the man’s shoulder back down.

Maybe he could call Aaron to come help with this. He wasn’t far away. He had to have learned something from that extra schooling of his.

“ _Fick dich! Lass mich alleine!_ ” the man spat, shaking shaggy dark blond hair from his face and struggling.

Andrew felt like he’d been shot, too. _That voice._

The man half-sobbed as Andrew grabbed his collar – yanked him up – stared –

Neil Josten met his eyes and went limp, the tears gathering in now-gray eyes an afterthought of complete shock.

“ _Ich hasse dich_ ,” Andrew whispered.

“A-Andr −”

“Who shot you?”

His voice was rusty, words jumbled. “It’s – I lost my gun − they know who I −”

Andrew surged to his feet and went to deal with it.

They weren’t terribly smart, this group – the first one basically walked into his knife. The second only had time to raise his gun before his own gut was receiving another blade, and his throat found the first. The third man fired and missed as Andrew went for him, and that was the last mistake he ever made.

He clenched his jaw against fury as he stared down at the bodies, forced himself to turn and walk away – back to _him_.

There was a lot more blood when Andrew turned the corner, and he found himself cursing and dropping to his knees to press a hand over the wound. And Neil – the damn idiot, the stupid, _stupid_ fucking dumbass, _Neil_ – opened his eyes that had slid shut. He looked dazed.

“Andrew? Is it really – am I just −”

Andrew swore louder as his fucking ringtone interrupted, and he could barely keep a grip in slick, bloody fingers of his free hand as he answered.

“Andrew, I sure _hope_ you’re almost here because I am about to be _married_ −”

“I need an ambulance right now,” Andrew hissed back at Nicky.

“What? Are you okay, are you – where are you, Andrew?”

“Neil’s bleeding out, get me Aaron!”

“What?” Nicky asked again, after a minute, much more faintly. “I −”

“What are you on about? Nicky looks like he’s seen a ghost.” Aaron’s voice was angry and harsh, and Andrew was going to kill them all if they didn’t get him some help _right now_. “You’re supposed to be here!”

“Neil Josten is dying in front of me,” Andrew growled. “Tell me how to save his fucking life.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> y'all out here!! bein sweet as hell with that feedback!! highkey been feelin terrible about literally every one of my hobbies but esp writing recently and thank u!!! for ur love!!  
> (And also, do I try to explain the canon divergence in a less-than-heavy-handed, but-still-making-some-kind-of-sense way in this chapter? yep! do I probably fail?? HELL YEAH,, oops)

Nathaniel – no, Alex – Neil – who was he?

Peter. Peter was his name, right? Now it was. For now. It would change again, when he moved on.

Peter tried to fight for consciousness before realizing that maybe he didn’t want to be aware…his side was a dull pain that felt like it was on the precipice of life-threatening…No, better to stay drifting…

Except why was he in pain? Was he in danger? Did he need to be running, he thought he’d been running – he had – hired men of hired men of Moriyama cronies had found him, he wasn’t safe, _he needed to wake up **right now**_ –

“Neil! Stop, stop!” Slightly tearful – a name from a lifetime ago, one he’d wanted to keep, for once –

He was dragging ragged breaths and half out of the strange sterile bed – in a _hospital_? _He’d be found out, how could he be here –_ tubes and needles and a thin gown trailing –

And Nicky Hemmick was holding his shoulders, lip trembling.

Peter nearly punched the big, unfamiliar man that rose up behind Nicky in his fearful shock, except someone caught his fist just as Peter recognized – Erik. Erik Klose. Not a threat.

He turned to the person holding his fist and collapsed back on the bed as hazel eyes met his – even, cold. _It wasn’t a dream._

“Neil. We thought you were dead.” A shaky exhale, and Peter’s eyes darted to Dan at the foot of his bed – more off-kilter than he’d ever seen her, leaning against a wide-eyed Matt.

“I didn’t sign up to hold your goddamn life in my hands,” called Aaron from by the door, his jaw set angrily, Katelyn rubbing his shoulder and looking pale. Renee, next to them, a hand over her mouth, and Allison, next to her, glaring, and for once, not the only one dressed up.

“Where was the fucking postcard, huh? The little text, ‘ _hey, fyi, I’m not lying face down in a ditch somewhere, just thought you all should know_ ’?”

The door opened, an impatient voice. “Thea had to leave, how long are we going to wait for him to −” Kevin stopped and stared and swallowed. And Peter could only stare back before suddenly, the man with the number two removed from his face strode across the room and yanked him forward by the collar.

“What the hell, Josten! Just up and vanishing, you could have been something! You were so close! We all were!”

A scuffle and a thump and a cry of “Andrew!”

Nicky had tried and failed to restrain his cousin, but Renee had jumped in with a silent, careful hand hovering in front of the man’s chest. Peter couldn’t see her face, but her shoulders were tense, and could bet that her expression matched Andrew’s icy, dark one.

“ _Don’t touch him, Kevin._ ”

The edgy energy of the room heightened at the tone in Andrew’s voice. Kevin eyed him and made the wise decision to release his grip, while Peter winced as he went to go lie back down and his wound protested.

“I’m sorry,” he said finally, to everyone. To them all, for everything. He tried to meet eyes and failed. “I…I didn’t want to leave. I thought after I got away that the Moriyamas would come after me, and…all of you.” And he was right, they came after him after he’d somehow managed to swipe a knife and kill his father, after he’d gotten wounded in the crossfire of FBI and Wesninski underlings and dragged himself out of that house and _run_. An escaped investment was a lot different than an underling murderer. One was worth keeping alive to reclaim, and the other was to be killed on sight. Or, maybe, before being killed, _probably_ , his mind had whispered as he had wavered in and out of consciousness that night, _probably worth hurting with everyone he loved._

_All of the Foxes would have been in danger, if he’d gone back. It hadn’t been a petty pride thing anymore. For their safety, he’d had to leave._

“Did you think we’d care, idiot?” Allison’s words were as sharp as her narrowed eyes, her manicured nails biting into her tightly folded arms. “We were Foxes, it came with the territory. Seth taught us that much. Why would we be scared of the Moriyamas this time?”

“We would have fought for you, Neil,” murmured Matt. “All of us would.”

Peter stared at his hands – scarred now, like the rest of him, from so many more brushes with death he’d had in the years since the Foxes. Reached for the heavy bandages around his middle. He couldn’t regret it. None of them had these because he ran.

“I still have your invitation,” said Nicky from the corner, sporting a reddened cheek courtesy of Andrew. “For mine and Erik’s wedding. But, uh, we all came when we heard you were here and we…kinda missed it, so.”

“But we should let Neil be now,” said Renee quietly. “I’m sure he’s tired.”

Except she was very clearly looking at Andrew, and the other Foxes were casting their own glances now, which confused Peter. No one had known, about the… _nothing_ between him and Andrew.

“We’ll see you soon, Neil. Okay?” Matt said as they all started filing out, his brows furrowed hesitantly, as if Peter would sprint out the door as soon as they turned their backs. His eyes lingered on Andrew, standing still where Renee had left him, giving him a small smile before she headed out the door. Andrew stared back at Matt, stormy expression otherwise unreadable.

The silence when the door closed was absolute, neither of them moving until Andrew’s eyes finally flicked from the door to Peter.

“Are you actually suicidal?”

“I didn’t want to put anyone in danger,” Peter insisted weakly, as Andrew advanced toward him. “The Moriyamas weren’t going to let it go this time.”

“Oh, a suicidal _martyr_ , why am I not surprised.”

“I’m sorry,” he said again, but it was even worse than addressing the entirety of the Foxes, and fury snapped in Andrew’s eyes for a sudden, breathless moment. Then he turned his head away and paused and said, “Yes or no?”

Peter inhaled, trembling, and said, “Yes.”

It was quiet again when Andrew turned back, eyes drifting across Peter’s face. His fingers outstretched to skate lightly over the scars, the ones he hadn’t had in their last meeting, soft over tender bruises and bandages covering new cuts. Reached his hair and grasped a little.

“Peter Weber,” Andrew said. “That’s what all your IDs said, when they looked for them in the ambulance.”

Peter blinked. “Yeah.”

“Is that who you are now? Not Neil?” Andrew’s gaze snapped to meet his. “Not Abram?”

“I…” Peter’s throat felt thick, his mouth dry. He’d only ever wanted to be Neil. Leaving him behind was one of the hardest things he’d done. “I didn’t…it wasn’t safe. To stay, and be Neil.”

“It’s safe now,” Andrew said. “You can stay.”

He had to sit with that, for a minute, with Andrew’s hand in his hair. Andrew’s grip and his gaze were steady. Like he always was.

“Yes or no?”

“Yes,” Andrew said, the only change in him a slight tightening of his fingers.

“Okay,” said Neil, leaning forward to seal his lips to Andrew’s.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kevin didn’t have the balls to make a grand gesture with the queen tattoo in this AU without Neil’s “fuck the Moriyamas” energy driving him …boo, kevin, boo  
> also riko is still alive in this universe dammit can’t believe I’m out here pulling this shit  
> I’m probably gonna try to pull a bullshit epilogue out of my ass so that,,,Neil can actually live in relative safety but uhh not 100% yet on how that’ll go down lol ;;o_o


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> writing Andrew is always a wild ride my dudes I never know what’s going on  
> but here’s that epilogue I promised forever ago bc I kept fucking with it to try and make it good…don’t know how much I succeeded in that ;_;

“They’ll come for me,” Neil said dully and quite suddenly, as Andrew waited for him to pull a seatbelt over his still-bulky-with-bandages torso. It was weeks later, sitting in the hospital parking lot – the soonest that the doctors would let him out from under near lock and key. “They know where I am now.”

“I killed them,” Andrew said.

Neil shook his head – his eyes were darting through space, like they used to for Exy plays, but this time, it’s entirely the rabbit planning an escape, unhearing, unreachable. “They’ll find me. They always do. I have to leave. Before they come for all of you.”

Andrew examined his nails as he pulled out of the parking lot. The flecks of blood of Neil’s assailants were long gone, but he felt phantom drops in his nail beds. “No, you don’t.”

Neil’s hands hovered at his stomach, shredding his lower lip between his teeth, silent as he stared out at the passing German landscape. Andrew couldn’t have that, no.

“Do you remember the promise I made you? At Palmetto?”

Neil shuddered, but his voice was still far away. “Yes.”

“Do you think I made that for nothing?”

“I told you to break it, though.”

“And I thought you died. Twice.” He could finally feel Neil look at him at that. He kept his tone cool. “I’m done with the whole shtick. I told you it was safe. No one is standing aside to let them have you.”

He pulled the car into the hotel parking lot – and there everyone else was, the busybodies. All waiting.

Neil’s breath was sharp. “But they −”

Andrew cut the engine and let his gaze flick to Neil. “You know how many of them are famous, rich people with connections now? Strings were pulled, Neil. Puppets danced. Everyone tripped over themselves to cover you. And Kevin? Kevin knew what he owed me, regardless of his choices since Palmetto. He took care of it. All of them took care of it.”

Neil’s mouth worked silently as his eyes turned out the window to the group of their former teammates – particularly the tense-looking tall man in the back with his arms folded, no number marring his cheekbone anymore – even as prickly anger tightened Andrew's fingers on the keys of the rented car. Of course Neil couldn’t comprehend anyone jumping to help him. Of course he wouldn’t believe it, want it, he’d probably take off as soon as the door was opened –

“Andrew.”

Andrew looked.

Neil had shifted closer, instead of opening the door to leave, though the creases in his brow, the tightness in his jaw, his short breath all suggested it had taken more pain than it was worth. Andrew glared at him, the dumb man putting himself in pain for no reason. Looking lost. “Do you – can I −”

“What the hell is it.”

Neil’s eyes cleared at the cool utterance – since when was Andrew being himself a grounding experience for anyone? – and he looked down at Andrew’s fist, clenched tight around the keys. A soft smile, bittersweet. “Thank you.”

Andrew could feel his own teeth clench in a snarl as he dropped the keys to grab Neil’s collar, shove him back against his seat. “Don’t you say it like that. Don’t fucking do that.”

Neil gasped in pain, and stared, and couldn’t seem to figure out what he’d just fucking done.

“‘Thank you,’” Andrew quoted sarcastically, a breath from his face, “‘You were amazing.’”

“No,” Neil whispered, and shook his head, slowly, then quicker, again and again. “I’m not…I’m sorry. I’m…”

Suddenly, Andrew’s fingers twisted in fabric were found gently by Neil’s.

“Andrew, I won’t run. I promise.”

A knock on the window, and they drew apart to see Allison’s impatiently narrowed eyes. “Break it up, boys.”

Andrew watched as Neil slowly, hesitantly unbuckled himself, opened the door, stepping out into the crowd surrounding him – everyone smiling this time, some of them tearful as they reached for him.

Andrew stepped out of his side of the car, away from the display, of emotion and sentiment and too-much-too-loud-too-close. In his own bubble, breathing into the new words from Neil’s lips that weren’t _last words_ anymore – _I won’t run. I promise._

He rounded the car to head for the hotel – he wasn’t going to be part of the giant mob, he would wait for it to boil over, to find out what they all decided – what _Neil_ decided – later. If a promise outweighed a runaway’s nature.

He was through the lobby and halfway up the unending staircases when –

“Andrew!”

Again, fingers caught his.

Neil, running after him, having extricated himself from the horde, Dan’s lipstick mark on his temple. He looked almost exhilarated, a far cry from these last few weeks. “Can I come back with you?”

“To my room?” Andrew asked dryly, continuing upward. Neil followed, blasé and uncaring of Andrew’s brushing off.

“On the plane. To where you live.”

“To the middle of nowhere, to do nothing?”

Neil jogged ahead of him to turn back, face beginning to split in a grin.

“To coach Exy, Andrew.”

Andrew paused, caught himself, and rolled his eyes. Pushed past Neil. “You overcame that spell of running forever awful fast, didn’t you? Don’t know if I can see you rooted in one place for long, even with your precious Exy.”

“I know you didn’t lie. I trust you. And I trust them.” Neil kept pace. “Kevin told me the Moriyamas were even leaving him alone, for the most part. And I’m not going to break my promise to you.”

That carried weight. Andrew acknowledged it with a moment of silence. “Where are you going to coach stickball, addict? How are you getting that job?”

“Kevin said he could have it lined up. For me, and for you too, if you wanted. Together.” Andrew could hear the half-laugh in his voice. “‘If you finally wanted to finish moping,’ he said.”

Andrew ignored Kevin’s quoted jibe, unlocking his room door, and stepped inside, turning to face Neil. “And if I didn’t plan on dealing with the dumb sport again?”

“Then it’s fine. You don’t have to. I won’t make a deal or anything for it.” Neil smiled at him, a tiny but sure thing as he leaned in the doorway. “If you don’t want to.”

“Even if we co-coach, I still hate you,” Andrew finally tossed over his shoulder as he turned away again, to head for his luggage, to pack. For home – with some kind of future in mind, for once in his life. “Are you coming?”

“Yes,” Neil said, smile growing as he stepped inside, letting the door slide shut behind him. “I’m coming.”

 

(Nicky and Erik’s next wedding went without a hitch – and Andrew and Neil both studiously ignored that their dual invitation came addressed to the “Minyard-Jostens.”)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fuck I gave andrew another trigger I’m sorry bud u don’t deserve that but I’d also shake neil josten vigorously if he looked at me all sadly and said “thank you” the way he had to have said it when he thought he was gonna die and he had to express everything he felt for andrew  
> -  
> ANYWAY WE DID THAT HOPE Y’ALL LIKED IT I’m utter trash for this fandom like nothing else honestly and it’s ruining my life,, I met up with a cosplay bud in another cOUNTRY and we cosplayed andreil together bc nOBODY NEAR ME IS TFC TRASH FUCK ([here some of it be btw, we looked cute af!!](https://www.instagram.com/p/Bzk9p1xnzCL/))  
> [I also have another andreil fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16493906) that I want to get back to at some point so if u liked this one please consider checking that out as well!

**Author's Note:**

> comments are my lifeblood ( ˘ ³˘)♥  
> -  
> psst: [check out my new purely AFTG tumblr here if you'd like i'd really appreciate it!!](https://foxy-exy.tumblr.com/)  
> [my creative tumblr](http://kayizcray.tumblr.com) | [my personal tumblr](http://ihaveacleverfandomurl.tumblr.com/) | ([& my cosplay instagram](https://www.instagram.com/kayizcray/) with some very occasional aftg cosplay on it)  
> 


End file.
